My Blog

Being single is not…

· An affliction

· A condition

· An unfortunate state

· A problem

· Something that you need to change

Being single is not evidence …

…that you are not lovable

…that there is something wrong with you

…that you need to be better, different or more

Each one of us has a unique purpose. We create meaningful work, rich relationships and a magnificent, fulfilling life when we live on purpose. When we live from our being we live a life in alignment with our vision, values and life purpose.

When we live from our being we can genuinely love and be loved by others.

Don’t confuse being single with living a life that is "less than." Avoid judging and comparing the lives of others. Richness, passion, satisfaction, fulfillment and personal reward come in many different packages.

If you find yourself judging yourself or others, stop and listen to the voice deep within you. What are the words that are being spoken? What are the thoughts associated with this judgment? Can you identify the energy or the feelings inside you? Do you notice any tension anywhere in your body?

What does your mother believe about being single? What does your father believe about being single? Was there a time in your life when someone you respected offered a derogatory point of view about being single?

Sit down for a few minutes and invite your thoughts, memories, feelings and body sensations to be present inside you. Take a few deep breaths. Allow yourself to just be with this experience. Resist making any interpretations or any meaning about what you are experiencing.

Our judgments, actions and reactions are a rich source of information for us to explore and to learn from. Thank yourself for becoming aware of this judgment you hold about yourself and or others. There is nothing to do in the moment. Allowing the awareness is a big enough job. Respect it and let it just be for now.

There is an old saying, “All things in their own time and space.” Let this be the time that you are becoming aware. With increased awareness comes increased choice and deeper knowing. Trust the process.

Remember, only you can make it happen!

By Margot Carmichael Lester After a string of horrible dates or a particularly bad breakup, it’s easy to think dating is for the birds. So, are you better off single? Take this quiz to find out!

1. Your last serious relationship was:

• Excruciating. I couldn’t wait for it to end. (Score = -1)
• Smothering. My partner cared much more than I did. (Score = 1)
• Frustrating. I cared much more than my partner did. (Score = 2)
• Decent. It was nice while it lasted, but I wasn’t devastated by the breakup.
  (Score = 3)
• Fulfilling. I like being a couple.
  (Score = 4)

2. How would you describe your last three dates?

• Bad. Why are losers so attracted to me? (Score = -1)
• Boring. I’d rather stay home and watch Lost. (Score = 1)
• One-sided. I liked them, they didn’t like me. (Score = 2)
• Not bad… but not good either. (Score = 3)
• Great. I had fun, even though no sparks flew. (Score = 4)

3. Which movie best describes your experience with love:

• Singles. I can’t seem to find love at all. (Score = -1)
• Fatal Attraction. I can be a freak magnet. (Score = 1)
• The (Fru)st(r)ation Agent. I feel like a misfit of love. (Score = 2)
• The Kids are Alright. I’ve been in relationships with a lot of nice people.
  (Score = 3)
• High Fidelity. I keep learning from my previous relationship mistakes, and I know there’s someone out there for me. (Score = 4)

4. Your soul mate:

• May not exist. (Score = -1)
• Wouldn’t need a straightjacket. (Score = 1)
• Is dating your best friend. (Score = 2)
• Will take some work to find—but is out there. (Score = 3)
• Hey, there may be more than one—and you can’t wait to meet ’em! (Score = 4)

5. You think of true love as:

• Something invented by Hollywood. (Score = -1)
• A bed of nails. Maybe Nazareth was right when they sang, “Love hurts.” (Score = 1)
• Very hard to find. (Score = 2)
• Possible, but I’m not sure how to get it. (Score = 3)
• Totally worth working for. (Score = 4)

SCORING
Less than 0: Ouch. You’ve been out of the love light for a long time and have a pessimistic view of the whole idea, so you need to do something to shake off the dust. Sign up for a class, a book group, or some other activity you enjoy. By getting out and living your life, you increase your chances of finding someone who’d like to live it with you!
0-5: You’ve had some bad experiences with love, but blaming your dates isn’t going to change anything. Dating is a two-way street. Yes, oddballs might be attracted to you, but you’re choosing them, too. Take responsibility and look at why you’re choosing to date these people. Then take some steps to change the patterns you’re perpetuating.
6-10: You’re unsure of your prospects. Start thinking positively—and take some concrete action to improve your chances. Ask friends to set you up. Post or update your online dating profile and start looking for love in all the right places.
11-15: You’re keeping hope alive, and that’s very attractive. But you could do a little more to attract a mate. Ask friends to help you identify your strong points—and your weak ones. Then emphasize the positive and improve the negative.
16-20: You’re a believer, baby! It’s only a matter of time till Cupid works his magic on you!

Margot Carmichael Lester is a North Carolina-based writer and author of The Real Life Guide to Life After College.

Nasa Friday Magic Madness na yung mga paborito mong
kanta. Nakaka-relate ka na sa Classic MTV.

Lesbiana na yung kinaaaliwan mong child star dati.

Nanay na lagi ang role ng crush na crush mong matinee idol
noon.

Dati, pag may panot, sisigaw ka agad ng "PENDONG!".
Ngayon, pag may sumisigaw nun, ikaw na yung napapraning.

Parangbotika na ang cabinet mo.
May multivitamins, vitamin E, vitamin C, royal
jelly, tsaka ginko biloba.

Dati, laging may inuman. Sa inuman, may lechon,
sisig, kaldereta, inihaw na liempo, pusit, at kung anu-ano pa.

Ngayon, nagkukumpulan na lang kayo ng mga
kasama mo sa Starbucks at oorder ng tea.

Wala na ang mga kaibigan mo noon.

Ang dating masasayang tawanan ng barkada sa canteen,
napalitan na ng walang katapusang pagrereklamo tungkol sa kumpanya
ninyo.

Wala na ang best friend mo na lagi mong pinupuntahan kapag may problema
ka.

Mahirap nang makahanap ng totoong kaibigan. Hindi mo
kayang pagkatiwalaan ang kasama mo araw-araw sa opisina.

Kung sabagay, nagkakilala lang kayo dahil gusto ninyong kumita ng pera
at umakyat sa tinatawag nilang "corporate ladder".

Anumang pagkakaibigang umusbong galing sa
pera at ambisyon ay hindi talaga totoong pagkakaibigan.

Pera din at ambisyon ang sisira sa inyong dalawa.

Pera. Pera na ang nagpapatakbo ng buhay mo.

Alipin ka na ng Meralco, PLDT, SkyCable, Globe,Smart, at Sun.

Alipin ka ng Midnight Madness.

Alipin ka ng tollgate sa expressway.

Alipin ka ng credit card mo.

Alipin ka ng ATM.

Alipin ka ng BIR.

Dati-rati masaya ka na sa isang platong instantpancit canton.

Ngayon, dapatmay kasamang italian chicken ang fettucine alfredomo.

Masaya ka na noon pagnakakapag-

ober-da-bakod kayo para makapagswimming.
Ngayon, ayaw mong lumangoy kung hindi Boracay o Puerto Galera anglugar.

Dati, sulit na sulit na sa yo ang gin pomelo.

Ngayon, pagkatapos ng ilang bote ng red wine,
maghahanap ka ng San Mig Light o Vodka Cruiser.

Wala ka nang magawa. Sumasabay ang lifestyle mo sa
income mo.

Nagtataka ka kung bakit hindi ka pa rin nakakaipon kahit tumataas
ang sweldo mo.

Yung mga bagay na gusto mong bilhin dati na sinasabi mong
hindi mo kailangan, abot-kamay mo na.

Pero kahit nasa iyo na ang mga
gusto mong bilhin, hindi ka pa rin makuntento.

Saan ka ba papunta?

Tol, gumising ka. Hindi ka nabuhay sa mundong ito
para maging isa lang sa mga baterya ng mga machines sa Matrix.

Hanapin mo ang dahilan kung bakit
nilagay ka rito.

Kung ang buhay mo ngayon ay uulit-ulit lang hanggang
maging singkwenta anyos ka na, magsisisi ka.

Lumingon ka kung paano ka nagsimula,
isipin ang mga tao at mga bagay na nagpasaya sa yo.
Balikan mo sila.

Ikaw ang nagbago, hindi ang mundo.